How To Tell What Sign A Person Is.Saying.In Sign Language Six Steps to a Positive First Impression Using the SOFTEN Approach!

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Six Steps to a Positive First Impression Using the SOFTEN Approach!

Think you’re making a good first impression?

They say “you never get a second chance to make a first impression” and it really is true.

When you first meet someone, they weigh you and make a decision about what kind of person they think you are and everything that happens in the first seven seconds, you want to make the best impression you can.

There is a great book my Marcia Grad called Charisma: How To Get That Special Magic.

In her book Marcia lists six steps to make a positive first impression, even giving a memorable mnemonic so you can easily remember.

The mnemonic is SOFTEN.

I’ll explain exactly what that means for you right now.

  • Smile

When you first meet someone there is nothing that can get you off to a good start than a genuine smile. A genuine smile can break down the most hardened individual’s defenses.

A genuine smile says a lot of positive things about you, it says that you are happy, approachable, enthusiastic and positive.

If you don’t smile when you meet someone for the first time you meet them as grumpy, worried and uncomfortable, is this the kind of first impression you want to make?

  • Open body language

When you have open body language it lets the other person know that you are open to them emotionally and that you are willing to listen to what they have to say without prejudice.

If you have closed body language, such as crossed arms, crossed legs, or you have your body away from the person you are interacting with, it gives the impression that you lack confidence and also that you are not interested in what they have to say to you.

  • Next Lean

When you like someone and find them interesting, you tend to lean forward towards them, this is a universal sign that you are interested in what they have to say.

When someone gets on your nerves or you have little or no interest in what they have to say, then you will find yourself pulling away from them and holding back, subtly keeping your distance from them.

  • touch

When you meet someone for the first time, one of the first things you will do is shake hands with them, if you are a businessman, this is the only time that is appropriate for you to touch and believe me judged by your hand.

If your hand is too lifeless and limp (we call it the “dead fish”) people do not want to do business with you because you come as a weak personality, yes, they will get all the information from one hand.

If your hand is like a vice and you cut the circulation in his hand (we call it “the crusher”) then it is as bad as the “dead fish”.

When you crush someone’s hand in a handshake, you’re telling them you have something to prove, whether it’s to yourself or to them, you’re trying to dominate by sheer brute force and people don’t like to be dominated.

You need to find a happy medium between the two styles, not too weak and not too firm, but somewhere in the middle.

  • Eye contact

When you look into someone’s eyes you connect with them on an emotional level, which does not give you carte blanche to enter a staring contest, you hold the people’s gaze long enough for them to feel a connection, a good rule of thumb. is to look into his eyes long enough to see the color of his eyes and then repeat the color of his eyes to yourself in your head before looking.

When you meet someone who refuses to look you in the eye, you automatically think that they have something to hide, that they are different and unreliable, and if they look too long it makes you feel like they are trying to intimidate you, you need to find a happy medium with this approach too.

  • Node

You can agree with what someone says without even saying a single word just by nodding your head, that’s the power of body language.

By nodding, you’ll show them that you agree with what they’re saying.

When you meet someone for the first time and shake their hand, it always helps to give a little nod, this will confirm to them that you are pleased to meet them and that you appreciate them.

Remember “you never get a second chance to make a first impression” so use the SOFTEN approach and make your first lasting impression for all the right reasons.

You won’t get a second chance.

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