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The Four Styles of Emotional Manipulation

Everyone, at some point in their life, will have felt the icy grip of an emotional manipulator that reaches inside a part of them that they feel unable to defend themselves, no matter how hard they try.

The purpose of a manipulator is to do just that, to manipulate! The purpose of his game is to gain control of the person who is his chosen victim; The reason for this is if they gain control over the other, then that person can be made in many ways malleable to the wishes of the manipulator, thus reducing any form of threat to the manipulator. Usually, however, it is the manipulator’s paranoia and low self-esteem gets stuck in their mind giving them the impression that anyone and everyone is, or could be, a threat.

To overcome this and to keep safe in his own mind; they would try to trick the chosen victim into feeling vulnerable, so whether or not the victim was about to attack, they would usually be unable to.

There are four main types of manipulator to watch out for, and these are

The Rejecter

This manipulator is particularly unfortunate and cuts directly to the heart of the deepest fear of 95% of the human race which is that of being alone. This fear is so devastating that people will do almost anything to avoid it, including trying to gain the affection of the manipulators.

The insult

This type of manipulator is “the jovial one” continuously cracking the odd joke here and there, comments on weight gain/loss, baldness and any other area the victim feels self-conscious about, but when the victim says how they feel , the manipulator comes back with “I’m just kidding” or “don’t act like that” (a hit and run attack).

The bully

This style is more visible, but also try to keep it subtle. This style of manipulation works by subtle or noticeable changes in the language of the body, heavier breathing, display of anger, moving away, raised voice or the appearance of them being ready to attack. A change made quite often with the same model, but without knowing why, often leaves a victim confused and on the verge of fearing the beginning of physical violence.

The nice guy

This manipulator is by far one of the most powerful. Posing as a friend and giving the impression that they are on the side of the victims, slowly gain their trust and willingness to open their hearts and then subtly leave degrading comments and how even that the victim is a great friend some of his views and interests. I’m just not right and then the manipulator will seal the attack with, I’m just telling you because I care, giving the victim the appearance of someone who feels supported and come back to when he needs it, but in all essence making it depend .

Manipulator are sometimes the most in the face types (physical violence) but the most harmful; they are the emotional types who enter the minds of their victims, hijack their emotions leaving them confused and vulnerable, giving the manipulator all the power. If you feel uncomfortable around someone but you don’t know why, the chances are that you are in their grip and in many cases both parties are not aware, but it is your responsibility to stop the game.

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